Intuition

I’ve always been skeptical of psychics and the like… I find it very hard for a complete stranger to tell you a lot about your life. However, I remember this time as a child when my mother told me she contacted a psychic. I don’t remember much about it, other than what the psychic had to say about me. She told my mother that I was very intelligent, but that I constantly doubted myself. She told my mother to tell me not to be afraid to raise my hand in class. That is still an issue I am working on. It was spot on and this psychic never even talked to me directly.

Let’s fast-forward a decade or two. I went to San Diego Pride a few weeks ago. One of my companions was a relatively new friend, Andy. He had gone to LA Pride not too long before. I was completely jealous. He saw Danity Kane (may the band rest in peace… perhaps for good) and I wanted to know his thoughts on LA as that’s where I plan to head after I get my degree. I expressed some doubts I was feeling and he told me he had a tarot reading done recently and it really helped him put things in perspective.

I decided in the car that when we got to San Diego, despite my fear of having a tarot reading due to my knowledge of the musical, Carmen, I would find someone and have a reading… Well, I was really drunk the entire time and forgot. I didn’t think about it again until the other day. One of my amazing co-workers in named Diana. She has been very much like a mother figure to me these past few months. She has a gay son around my age. I’ve talked to her about a lot of stuff, recently has been my worry about LA and if I am making the right choices.

She referred me to a woman to have my tarot reading done. She lives all the way in Peoria, but something in me yesterday told me to go today, so I set an appointment and I went. She was so warm and inviting. The first thing she did was say hello and give me a hug. We then sat down at her table and we held hands for a few minutes so we could connect.

As we were connecting, she tells me that music is very important and prominent in my life. I always talk about writing as my passion, and it is, but music pumps through my blood. I am also listening to music and always singing. Sometimes I’ll hear a song and will get inspiration for a scene. She told me she felt this rhythm about me as we were connecting. Music is very important to me, but that is something I’ve never told anyone about, because I never felt a need to do so.

Before I picked my cards, she asked me what I wanted to know. I told her I was very interested in finding out about my career and I wanted to make sure I was making the right decisions. I drew my cards and she laid them out for me. She saw a lot about my career, but she also saw a lot about my love life, which was odd. I remember when I was talking with Diana yesterday, I told her I was less interested in my love life and more interested in my career.

I didn’t hear a lot that I didn’t already know, and she let me know this. She told me I am very intuitive but I have a hard time balancing my lofty ideas against my Virgo desire to be practical and realistic (she is a Virgo as well). The only thing she asked my prior to the reading, aside from my name when I set the appointment, was what am I studying, where I am studying it and my astrological sign. I told her I was studying Film. I wanted to keep it vague to see what she would see in the cards.

All of the career stuff was very positive. She told me I am definitely on the right path and if I keep at it, I will be successful. That was great to hear. The cards showed her a lot of growth and creativity. I’m in a time of growth and need to start putting the building blocks together for my career. The cards also showed her that I worry a lot about love and finding The One. She told me not to worry, I will find him.

She asked if I had an older male mentor in my life. I told her I didn’t. She told me that sometime in the next year, one would come into my life, perhaps through school. She also told me to get involved in a local theater group or something. She believes I will not only meet this older male mentor that way, or perhaps through school, but she also believes I will find the one through such endeavors as well. I could also possibly meet the mentor through school, but she felt I won’t meet the one through school or work.

This older male mentor will have a lot of experience in the business. Either he will have worked in Hollywood or owned a theater… or both, and he will help guide my career and my career choices. She also made sure to express that this older male mentor will not be a lover of mine, because I guess the card he showed up through can sometimes be interpreted as love.

The cards also showed my past. She told me I had some feelings of loss I am still dealing with that are hurting my future that I need to let go of, she also saw a lot of family issues that I need to work out. All of which is very true. She saw some financial gains coming soon, which will be nice… She also said that I get depressed from time to time and I have a tendency to get bored. Once again, something I don’t really talk about, but something she was spot on about. She gave me great advice for both.

Most of what she had to tell me was generally positive and good. There was only one thing that can be seen as a negative thing I will encounter. She told me I would meet a man I would think was the one, but he wouldn’t be. I’d be greatly attracted to him and he would have the ability to hurt me really badly if I’m not careful, but he would teach me lessons in love. She also said I will come upon some struggles in LA, but I’ll make it through alright.

After the reading, we just chatted and I told her more about myself and my family trouble. She gave me advice and was very motherly. She also has a son around my age. I was told to trust myself more. No more doubting myself or questioning myself. When I speak of my career, I am to say “I will do… this this and that” rather than “I’d like to…” or “Maybe I can…” She also told me to stop seeking validation from outside sources. She strongly urged me to start making connections now. I think she felt that my best option for LA is to go with people I meet here who want to be in the film industry as well (going back to the giving involved in local theater groups or something). She also told me that surrounding myself with likeminded people will help keep me motivated and driven. She was once an actress, however, she told me she was unable and unwilling (being the Virgo she is) to take the necessary risks to be successful. She told me I wouldn’t have the same problem she did.

I left feeling so much better. This entire summer, I’ve been worried about ending up in LA and deciding it was the worst decision of my life. I know there will be struggles and I know there will be hard times, but I feel this reading was exactly what I needed right now.