I’ve always had a bittersweet relationship with True Blood for several reasons. I find myself unable to stop watching, yet it feels very much like a soap opera because very little seems to actually be happening. I’m used to shows like Buffy: The Vampire Slayer, where there were season arcs and whatnot. It always throws me off when a show doesn’t have that.
I remember the first time I saw True Blood like it was yesterday. It was the summer of 2010, sometime in the beginning of July. I was dating my first boyfriend at the time. I had heard of the show, but didn’t have HBO or enough curiosity to seek out a way to watch it.
I drove up to Flagstaff that weekend because Keith was there visiting some of his best friends and wanted me to come meet them. I’d never been to Flagstaff, at that time, and wasn’t particularly interested in going, but he got upset that I wouldn’t go, so I went.
The first night we were there, we watched True Blood. It was some episode in season two because I remember him talking about how hot Eggs was and I made him look away whenever he was on the screen.
We broke up after that Flagstaff trip. It sucked, especially because a few days later I went to San Diego Pride for the first time and for parts of the trip I was too sad to even get out of bed.
When I got home from San Diego, I started watching True Blood from the beginning. It reminded me so much of Keith and made me sad, but I couldn’t stop watching the show. He was such a sweet guy.
I recently started watching True Blood again. I decided to start from the beginning, because it has been almost four years since I watched it. All those memories flooded back, especially when I got to season two.
It was my fault we broke up. Me and my diva ways (which were ten times worse than they are now back then). At the time, I regretted it, but I don’t regret it anymore. I feel everything happens for a reason and he was a good boyfriend. He set the bar pretty high.
Movies and TV shows tap into that romantic, vulnerable side of myself that I hide from the world. Someday, I think I’d like to be in love. And yes, I am aware that my actions are counterproductive to my desires.
Maybe I’ll write more about my romantic (or lack thereof) past in some later blog. For now, I’m going to get back to watching True Blood and fantasizing about some future love…
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